The Blog

I was driving home tonight and realized that Henry has been much quieter and I am not sure when that happened. In fact, I haven’t been shoulding myself as much either and I’m not sure when that happened! Don’t get me wrong, Henry, that little hamster on the wheel in my head, can still be annoying, even when he isn’t saying quite as much, but at least he lets up every now and then. This downward spiral into a dark depression was also much shorter than they have been in the pas

I am doing it! I am continuing to question the “Shoulds” and Henry of course! Henry has softened his snide remarks and his outlook on what I should and should not be doing. Thank goodness!! Even with the questioning and although I was starting to feel lighter, I could feel that I was still struggling. Why is it that we can give everybody else in our lives, even strangers, so much grace and compassion, but we can’t do that for ourselves. Why are we so hard on ourselves?

I said a couple of blog posts ago that I was going to continue to question the shoulds and then I went into a pretty bad spiral as you know from my last blog post. Well, today I am questioning those shoulds again and that would include Henry! In case you haven’t read my previous blog posts, Henry is what I named the hamster on the wheel in my head. You know the ongoing negative chatter in your head. Henry can be the worst one of all about throwing the “Should” word out! Much

It has been a roller coaster of emotions. Henry and the shoulds have been rolling around in my brain like crazy! I have really been trying to question the shoulds and tell Henry to shut the heck up but boy has it been difficult. I have been feeling unworthy, less than, not enough, low, dark and so, so disappointed in myself. Henry keeps telling me that I should be doing this or I should be doing that. Then he keeps telling me to get up off of my butt and get going. If you rea

Well here I am again, stuck inside the loop of Terrification. I hope you’ll all forgive me for not being regular in this endeavour, at least not yet anyway. I am really hoping that once I get going and put my thoughts out there that it will not only help me, but someone else too. Just knowing that I’m not alone is a huge help sometimes and I am hoping that is the same for others. Full disclosure, it’s been so long, I had to go back and read my previous blog post. As I said, I

Have you ever read something that made you stop for a second and say to yourself, oh my goodness, that is me, or, that explains so much!! That was me, just a couple of days ago. In fact, my mind has been reeling ever since. Reeling to the point that I have been feeling super heavy! That heavy that makes you question everything you’ve done and thought your entire life. That heavy, that brings tears to your eyes. That heavy that makes you feel a knot in your stomach and a lump

Terrification is the combination of terrified and procrastination which is what I have been since thinking about this blog idea. Hi, I’m Jeni, and I am a 55 year old woman who is terrified of social media and have just started with it since I decided that I wanted to create a blog. I am terrified of not being perfect, not doing things the right way, not getting it right; but after more than 2 years of worrying whether I am doing this right and working so hard on my overall he